News and Plans

So I've been pretty quiet on this blog for the past few weeks. That's for a couple of reasons. I've had a couple of bad spells of mild depression where I just couldn't be bothered to leave the house or do anything really. I think I know where it came from as well - after I had that hectic weekend two weeks ago I spent the next few days chilling out at home which turned into me spending most of the past two weeks not going out much. I did get out this weekend though - I was running some errands for my parents on Saturday and then spent about an hour in a coffee shop reading my book :) There were a lot of teens around seeing as it's half term week at the moment but I didn't feel self conscious sitting there on my own at all. I might give it another go somewhere a bit more busy next week - one of the things I want to work on is becoming comfortable doing thing and going places on my own. And today I went walking/hiking with some friends from my support group. It was a bit of a failure - we got completely lost and ended up getting a lift back to the start point from an off duty policeman but it was still a fun day out :)

Speaking of going places on my own ... I have some rather exciting news. This is also one of the reasons I haven't posted much recently; I didn't want to jinx it I suppose. I'm going away for a couple of months to the South West of England wwoofing on various farms and smallholdings. This is something I've wanted to do ever since I graduated but I haven't had the confidence or money to do it until now. I won't be gone for too long I don't think, 3 months at most. If all goes well and I enjoy it then I hope to go wwoofing abroad later on this year. So I suppose you could consider this a practice run :) My parents aren't terribly keen on the idea - I think they think it's going to be a complete waste of time and I know my mum thinks this is just me running away from "real life" and trying to avoid getting a job. And I suppose I am doing it to avoid getting a job - but not because of anxiety, just because I desperately want to have a bit of fun before I settle down. And I genuinely do want to learn about organic growing. And in a way this is an even bigger test of my SA than getting a job because I'll be moving around, meeting a whole set of new people every few weeks and learning to be a bit more independent.

So that's the plan for the next few months. I leave on the 2nd March (less than two weeks!!!) I'm mildly terrified at the prospect, I'm having visions of all kinds of things that could go wrong. But if there's one thing I've learnt over the past few months it's that nothing is ever as bad as you think it's going to be.