It’s over between me and my boyfriend. For good this time.
I havn’t written much about our relationship on this blog. There’s been so many times when I’ve wanted to moan and complain about him and I’ve even written out whole posts. I always ended up having a change of heart though as I know it wouldn’t have been fair on him. Suffice it to say our relationship has been pretty sour for a while now.
He spoke to my sister on facebook (which I thought was kind of weird but hey) the other day asking if I was OK and saying that he thought I was going to break up with him and that he’s been worrying about it. Then he texted me yesterday asking me to call him to talk about things but I couldn’t bring myself to speak to him last night so told him I’d call him today. I could have just lied and pretended things were OK but I feel like I’ve been lying to him for long enough. I know he’s been stressing and worrying about us for weeks (months even) now so I think I’ve done the right thing by just telling him the truth. I havn’t been in love with him for about a year now. It sounds awful when I say that and I can’t believe I kept stringing him along for such a long time when my heart hasn’t been in it. He’s been my best friend for all my time at uni so I knew that if I ended it I’d be losing a friend as well as a boyfriend and that thought terrified me. I know it was incredibly selfish of me but I was just so utterly terrified of being alone.
Urgh now I’ve started to cry L
I know I’ve done the right thing. I just really didn’t want to have to do it over the phone as I know it’s seen as the cowards way out. But he’s over 100miles away from me right now so it the only option really. And with my phone phobia it actually made it infinitely harder.
I just checked facebook and he’s already set his status to single. Barely even an hour after we spoke. He also made some comment on my page saying that I should probably change my status now. God I hate facebook. One of his (girl) friends has already “liked” his new relationship status. I know he’s been talking to his friends about us and they all told him he should end it. So now I feel like they all hate me and think I’m a bitch. Not that it matters as I’ll probably never see any of them ever again now.
Okay I’ve rambled on enough. Thanks for reading.
Hey Melanie,
ReplyDeleteYou did it! Good job. It takes lots of courage to break up with someone knowing the consequences. But staying in a relationship that won't advance will have worse consequences. So unfortunately, you had to pick the better of two evils. Just be glad it's done.
From your words, you seem to have a good heart. Remember that when people get broken up with, it is common for anger to arise. This guy is entitled to his reaction. The best you can do is take care of yourself, and ignore all that bs crap on facebook. He is hurt, and making you look bad is his way of dealing with it. You just stay focused on what you need to heal.
You are a good person, and sometimes we learn things the hard way. Relationships can be painful, but they are always learning experiences. So take what you've learned, and live your life. Don't punish yourself! You rock!