I just realised I never wrote about how the phone call to the prospective landlady went. In a word : terrible. I was very quiet apart from when she asked me a direct question. I ended up saying that I would email her to arrange to come and see the house in the Easter hols but I don't think I will anymore. I think I proved to myself by that phone call that I'm definitely not ready to live on my own just yet. I just got a bit over-excited because the house looked so pretty and they were renting it out really cheap.
hmm there was something else I was going to write about but it's escaping me right now ....
....
oh yeah
so I didn't mention this before but last weekend my boyfriends parents came down and I was invited out to dinner with them and my boyfriend (J) and my boyfriends brother and his girlfriend. I didn't go.
When I next saw J, it somehow came up in conversation that he had been reading about social phobia on the Internet - apparently he googled "how to deal with my shy girlfriend" or something along those lines (I'm not sure whether I should be offended by this or not - I thought it was quite amusing anyway) and came across it. He already knew I've got a "problem" and that I saw a therapist a few years ago but I've never really spoken to him in huge detail about it. I managed to hide it quite well for the first year we were going out but in the last year the severity of my "problem" has become more and more obvious, and has been causing a rift between us.
Anyway he was very sweet and kept saying that he wanted to help me through this. I think he got it into his head that he and he alone was going to be the one to cure me. I mentioned that I was thinking of giving therapy another go when I'm back home for good and he got a little weirded out, saying that therapy was something he thought only "mental" people have lol. But overall the conversation went better than I thought it would have.
Right I'm off to bed
goodnight world :) and thanks for reading
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